- Kate Bodin
I Still See You as the Tiny Baby I Kissed Goodbye - A Letter from my Birthmother
"I wish I could describe the feelings of joy and awe that I felt when I held your letter in my hands. For so many years I've imagined what you must be like, and here, finally, something tangible!"
Still feeling very cautious about contacting my birthmother Irene, I very carefully drafted a response to her letter of 26 January. Irene didn't say "Can't wait for your next letter", but she left the door just slightly open. Those of you who know me will understand that there was no way I was going to overlook this slender opportunity.
"Kate, forgive me for being hesitant about meeting you. First, I have to tell our daughters of the situation. I have never told them, and it's going to be difficult. If they feel that it is right at this time to bring you into our lives, then I will contact Leslie (at the Lund Home). I know you sent a picture (of yourself) to Leslie. I may have been strong 42 years ago, but I still see you as that tiny baby that I kissed goodbye. Give me time."
"Irene, please don't worry about taking all the time you need to talk to your daughters and to think things through. I'm not in any hurry, and I'm just so glad (and kind of astonished) that I'm sitting here writing a letter to you. I'd love to keep writing to you if you don't mind, and I'd love to have you write too. I'd also love to see a picture of you and your family when you feel you're ready to send one."
Looking back at the letter I wrote, I'm not sure that I would be quite so forward if I were to write it today, 25 years later. But, I had one opportunity, so I took it. See my full letter below.