Searching for my Birthmother - A Small Ray of Hope
Updated: Jun 2
Having left you all with the impression that meeting Irene was futile, I'll give you a tiny ray of hope.
You might remember that, on December 15th, 1998 (the day before my birthday), the Lund Home had called me to tell me that my birthmother Irene wanted no contact with me. When they called me, they mentioned that they had given her the option of writing a letter to me. The day after my birthday, Irene called the Lund Home and told them that she had been taken by surprise and wanted to think about the situtation over the holidays and would be back in touch in the new year. Meanwhile, I took a cue from the idea of writing a letter, and asked the woman I was working with at the adoption agency if she'd be willing to ask Irene if I could write her a letter explaining why I was interested in contacting her.
Irene took the time that she had requested, and in early January 1999 I received another phone call telling me that Irene was amenable to receiving a letter from me. I was to send it to the Lund Home in Vermont and they would forward it to Irene, so that no information about her whereabouts would be shared.
I drafted and re-drafted and re-drafted my letter to her. I knew that I wanted to handwrite it - there's something about a handwritten letter that is so much more personal than a typewritten letter, don't you think? And I knew that I had one chance to reach her. Finally, with the wording just right, I hoped, I carefully handwrote slightly more than 4 pages and sent the letter off to the Lund Home, heart in my mouth, fingers crossed and pretty sure that I'd never hear from her.
The entire letter:
It was a GREAT letter. I learned things about you I didn't know till now, and I have an inkling that your birth mother found it impossible not to reach out after receiving it. I will wait for the next installment with eager anticipation.
What a wonderful letter Kate. I feel I know you much better having read it.